Might as well write this down, get it off my chest before I explode.

It's really hard at times not to be bitter over something you're passionate about going wrong, especially when everyday, you have the reminder of it in your face, and you can't control it. A confrontation is something you really think about every day, how you'll approach the issue or issues facing you, and if you'll bottle it up inside, let it out in public, or hope for time to erase all wounds and wait it out.

Regrets are natural. They do happen, you start to play around with the "what-ifs" and wonder if instead of A leading to B, if A lead to C, or A never happened at all. As time goes by, in the months after the event happens, reminders of what could've been slap you in the face when you least expect. Depending on the person, you either shrug it off or you start thinking about it.

For all those reading and wondering if there's a point to all of this, there is. I wrote this to express a situation that was really hard on me, and left me to a crossroads.

Back in Februrary, my band decided to change direction and politely force me out, due to the fact that there was nothing getting done, no direction at all, among other things. At first, I swallowed all the natural bitterness that came with this news and believed that I did the right thing, by accepting my loss like a man.

However, as months went by, I learned some troubling news. My former bandmates had stayed in the same way since I left, no progress made, nothing. Every opportunity, pissed away. The very reasoning for my forced exit turned out to be nothing short of a massive hypocrisy.

I was upset to hear this, mainly because I sacrificed my one dream that I had always hoped to realize so that everyone else could do what they wanted to without feeling pressured to adapt to another style. Once you add in the sheer hypocrisy of the above facts, the entire situation changes. As all these thoughts swelled inside my mind, I could feel the bitterness, the disgust, the betrayal, all of those emotions build up, begging to be released in a confrontation.

Alas, I made a decision that may or may not have been "right" for me, but "right" for everyone else. I let it go, despite the troubling nature of the reality in my face, and the reasons that would justify such a choice of action. I had to accept the fact that I was wronged, and I could not do a thing about it.

Hence, my status message on Facebook Friday night about "swallowing a bitter pill". It was the only way to say what was going on, without saying what was actually happening.

So yes, this is a direct summary of what's been happening recently. Obviously, this was the best way to get it off my chest...or was it?

Let's just hope for the best...